Wednesday, July 3, 2013

sloppy joe's death metal: Coffins (Japan): "The Fleshland"

sloppy joe's death metal: Coffins (Japan): "The Fleshland"
Coffins is very good at what they do.
But it is what they do that you may like, maybe you may dislike. Let's find out!
Quick to draw, this is recommended for total Autopsy freaks. And no one else!!!
No, not if you "kind of" like Autopsy.
I mean, you reeeeeeeally like Autopsy, and you have Autopsy music in your collection and you listen to it, a lot more often than "once in a blue moon." You like Autopsy the way that Dismember liked Autopsy.
Coffins plays seriously sloppy, garage-style, gore grunt guttural death metal with a purposefully mud-swamp "production" hatchet job.
Their debut was published in 2005 and this is their fourth (at least) full-length album, and they have about a trillion EPs and splits.
Therefore, Coffins is no spring chickens, they have been around the block, they have rocked around the clock, they love the awful sounds of sloppy, gore death metal that is anti-modern, anti-melodic, anti-intelligence, and anti-a lot of other things.
The guitar tone is a boatful of sludge and slime, they get doom-ish in places and the vocals are about as low as the rumbling of the bass guitar (I'm exaggerating about the low vocals, but not by much).
Also, since this is no half-way project, the artwork for this album is a very, very good and talented gore scene drawing made by that sick, tormented 7th-grader that sits in the back of the classroom and that NOBODY likes because that kid is a major jerk and anti-social individual. Everybody knows he is a potential psychopath.
He definitely needs help from a professional.
So does Coffins. Ah, yes, the lyrics are incredibly stupid and glorify violence.
This music doesn't make people think and it does not make them better people, either.
It only makes them way, way more stupid than they were before they started listening to Coffins.
I have lost millions of brain cells just listening to this.
The music is fun, but the lyrics are garbage and the image is garbage and the whole violence glorification is an IQ reducer.
Let's review: so, how much do you like Autopsy? Would you recognize "Severed Survival" if you heard it? Do you know what song "Destined to Fester" is from? Can you name (without researching) the name of that little ditty of an album from 1995?
Oh, well, then, why didn't you say so?! Coffins is for you! Coffins is no Autopsy rip-off, but they love Autopsy and other sloppy death metal sounds. I just don't want to make a list of those bands right now because I have to go take a nap now and if I start making that list, then this review will go on for the next two weeks. Plus, you have other things to do, too, right?

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