review: Killitorous

Killitorous

The Afterparty

Tentacles Industries

22 May 2020

If you listen to the music itself, this is contemporary-style death metal with blasting, melodies, growling and an effort to make the headbanging tunes catchy. It’s easy to sense that this is pretty good stuff. It’s music that has lots of blasting and lots of guitar hooks. As death metal, it does not sound “evil,” “mysterious,” “brutal,” “ominous,” or any of those lame adjectives that we all like to use to hype up albums (It’s music, people, let’s take it down a notch with those adjectives. Settle down, eat a sandwich, chill.). What this is, is mosh pit good friendly physically active exercise music for getting sweaty, and if you are not at the mosh pit, then it’s good for lifting weights, running or that kickboxing class you are currently taking to fulfill your plan for your fists to be legally registered as lethal weapons. If your brain speeds up at the sound of growling and blasting, shredding and soloing, if you smile like Ace Ventura Pet Detective when your ears hear the sound of the blasting drums, then this has got your name written all over it. As already stated, this is good stuff, and there is a certain fresh feel to it, like the musicians’ excitement has been ably transformed into skillful fast, growling, tight extreme music.

However, there is one area in which the album does not succeed. It turns out that this is supposed to be “funny” death metal. Like 99.99% of death metal bands trying to be comedic, it does not work because music and comedy are different crafts. The vast majority of metal bands are not funny because they are not fully committed to comedy as a craft. Nuclear Assault, S.O.D., M.O.D., Gwar, Macabre, Brujería, Cannabis Corpse, Sore Throat, Steel Panther, the folk-polka-Viking-pirate-heathen bands, and many others, they all fail because the music itself does not sound funny. Then there are comedians like Brian Posehn trying to make funny metal and it doesn’t work because he clearly does not have the musical skills to make it comedic. How are people to supposed to know that you are funny if people literally cannot understand a word you are saying? Even if the lyrics are silly, if the music is not funny, then it’s just a bunch of people shouting and screaming to chugging guitars.

How do you make the music funny?! Well, it’s not like there are no examples of people doing it! The genius Frank Zappa dedicated his whole life to making funny rock music, and the music itself sounds rather funny for its time, including funny, silly, weird sounds in the music. There are literally more than 100 Zappa albums and all you have to do is go to YouTube to watch a comedy rock show. Maybe it’s not funny to you, but it is comedy rock. Just type “Frank Zappa – Does humor belong in music?” (1984); “Frank Zappa – The Torture Never Stops”; “Frank Zappa – We Don’t Mess Around – Circus Krone Munchen 1978”; “Frank Zappa & The Mothers Live at The Roxy, 1973”; “Frank Zappa – Barcelona 1988” and titles like that, and then there are the albums themselves. Another band is Primus. Metal people generally don’t like Primus, but silliness is part of the Primus sound. Scatterbrain was a comedy metal band, and the music itself had comedy in it. Nanowar of Steel is a comedy band today. So is Pyschostick. Are they funny? Maybe or maybe not to you, but it is meant to be silly, comedy music. For instance, why are death metal vocalists not experimenting with other sounds besides growling/screaming? What about making the sounds of chickens, sheep, ducks, hiccups, funny/accent voices, and throwing that in in unexpected places? There are sounds like tubas, accordions, trumpets, saxophones, and cartoon sounds that could create silly contrasts with chugging guitars? What about the drummers trying beats that sound off/odd and making that part of the music? Anyway, metal comedy is very underdeveloped and it’s because being a good comedian is a lot more than just cursing like a sailor and screaming. Comedy is a craft.

Anyway, this album right here is fun, moshing death metal music, but if you are expecting to laugh out loud like at a comedy show, then you’ll be disappointed. Just because they have song titles like “Married with Children” and “Rodney Dangerfield of Dreams,” that doesn’t make it comedy. Listen to this album to bang your head, and you’ll have fun. It’s good contemporary death metal with catchy guitar parts and a good vibe for banging your head. It’s not comedy, it’s death metal.